Monday, October 26, 2009

No more goodbyes, please - part 4

Those of you who follow this blog know that my boyfriend Tobi has had an immigration crisis for the last twelve months. I've blogged about it here, here and here.

There's recent news. It's good news and bad news. The good news is that Tobi has a very promising job possibility that would allow him to stay in the U.S. The bad news is that he has had to move across the country to get the job.

I put Tobi on a plane this Saturday with a one-way ticket. It was just about the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. We now live on opposite coasts of the U.S.

This crisis over the last year has taught me something. It has let me know how much I love this man. I love him truly, sincerely, durably. I want to spend my life with him.

Tobi and I don't know what the future will bring. I have enough flexibility that I should be able to spend time with Tobi in his new city fairly often, and I plan to do this. Maybe he'll be able to move back here with me after he gets permanent residency in a few years. Maybe I'll figure out a way that I can move there and be with him. Maybe we won't survive the separation. In any case, we're not going to spend time agonizing about that now. We're just going to move forward, knowing that we love each other and are willing to face this challenge together.

(Tobi's immigration problems are not yet over. I'll give another update in a couple of months when the next round of paperwork has been successfully processed. It's not quite time yet for celebration on that score.)

In the meantime, gambare, Tobi! My heart is with you in your new adventure.

4 comments:

Beck said...

Maybe not exactly what you wanted, but a better outcome than you imagined.

Best wishes for this new chapter in your lives!

MoHoHawaii said...

Hi Beck,

I have to say that I am counting my blessings right now. The situation isn't perfect, but it's definitely a reprieve.

Thanks for your support and good wishes.

C. L. Hanson said...

Best wishes to both of you!

I suppose it isn't possible for you to move near him?

MoHoHawaii said...

Hi Chanson,

Moving is a possibility, but it's not something I can do tomorrow. If in a year or two his situation proves to be stable, I may end up moving to be with him. It's entirely within the realm of possibility.